Creating a featured post

I have been writing in my journal a lot lately. I call it mush, but it seems to keep me sane.

My journal is entirely private, and I wouldn’t ever want to post it publicly. Back in the old days when I wrote in notebooks, I would never keep them for long for fear that someone else would read what I wrote. Now I write “securely” online in my Penzu journal. There’s this litte bit of uncertainty that it is not really private, but I’m taking the chance!  I write about my daily life, or my kids, or how great my boyfriend is, or the stories I make up about what I think other people are thinking. It includes alot of emotional out-letting, kind of like a good cry.

What does this have to do with writing a featured post, you may ask? Time. If I’m writing in my journal, then I’m not writing something to publish, although it is often a catalyst to  something I want to share. The featured post idea comes from Blogging 101, which I haven’t ended up participating in so much after all.  And since I am, after all, Embracing Uncertainty, I hesitate to announce that I will consistently have a piece on a particular day of the week or month. That would be too certain.

I wrote the above a few days ago. Here it is Saturday morning, January 31. It’s been a crazy busy week at work. Some say it is because of a full moon, or Mercury is in retrograde.  I think life is just like that sometimes, and we don’t always know why. The lull will come.

I’m enjoying my coffee in my favorite cup with my favorite “Advice from a Dragonfly” on it.

Spend time near the water

Be colorful

Enjoy a good reed

Zoom in on your dreams

Keep your eyes open!

JUST WING IT!

And that is the conclusion of the matter. In the uncertain future, I have plans for other blogs, poetry, books, and perhaps a featured post. For now, I will be gloriously and consistently inconsistent and random, fluttering here and there and everywhere like my friend the dragonfly.

Musings

If there is anything certain in life, it is that something will change. Kind of like the weather. Two days ago we had near freezing gloomy rain, and today it is beautiful and sunny, around 70 degrees.

Take this blog, and my reasons for writing, for example.  At the beginning of January I was determined that I was going to check in on my assignment for Blogging 101 every day and really improve what I am doing here. But I have only done a couple of the assignments. I keep playing around with the theme and widgets, and I think I’m finally happy with it. I do wish I could figure out how to insert a picture and text next to it as well as above or below it. Is there anyone reading who can help me with that?

I started thinking that I’m finding my voice and doing ok with writing, then I read this post about all the terrible writing that is appearing on the internet and was sure that she’s talking about me.(She also has some suggestions for some really good reads. )The same day someone nominated me for an award so I felt a bit better. But decided against accepting or getting involved in it due to the process required.

I was frustrated with myself this past week because I had nothing to write about. I felt tired and was crying for no apparent reason. Then I realized that I had expended a great deal of emotional energy writing the letter to my father, and deciding to post it here rather than actually mail it to him. Additionally, I am grieving the loss of the possibility of the kind of relationship I had hoped to have with him.

I’m trying to find the perfect balance of work, family, healthy eating and exercise, creative pursuits, writing, and occasionally traveling. I’m trying to figure out what I’m doing here. I don’t want to just try to get readers, I want to have something meaningful to say. Sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed by it all. That is when I remember to draw myself back into the moment and think about all that I have to be grateful for.

It’s Sunday night, and I will be back in the work-a-day world tomorrow morning. I have a comfortable bed to sleep in, plenty of food, lots of love to give and receive. Moment by moment I will look for opportunities to make a difference in someone else’s life, by a kind word or deed.

May your week be all that you want it to be, whatever you put your hand to do!

Hot Belly Diet

Daily prompt: Re-springing Your Step

Tell us about the last experience you had that left you feeling fresh, energized, and rejuvenated. What was it that had such a positive effect on you?

Last October my boyfriend and I went on the Hot Belly Diet. We both wanted to detox, clear our minds, lose a few pounds. I don’t think I would have done as well if he hadn’t been doing it with me, but together we stuck to it. It is an Ayurvedic approach to detoxing, making lifestyle changes, and I felt so good after the first week and for about a month afterward. I continued eating in the recommended way for about a month and a half, then the holidays came along, and, well, I got off track.

Although it is not advertised as such, it is basically dairy and gluten free, and almost vegetarian. You start the day with warm lemon water, drink a “daily drink” all day ( a detoxifying herbal tea), eat your largest meal at noon, and have no snacks. It sounds hard but I was surprisingly not hungry. I did have a few cheats – drank coffee a couple of times, had a glass of wine when we traveled and went out with friends, but it didn’t seem to set me back.

Wow, writing about it makes me want to go there again. The great thing about it, at least in my experience, is that it is easy to start up again.

Pen in hand

Daily prompt Pens and Pencils 

When was the last time you wrote something substantive — a letter, a story, a journal entry, etc. — by hand? Could you ever imagine returning to a pre-keyboard era?

I used to keep handwritten journals. I’ve thrown most of them away, because I don’t want anyone to read them even when I’m dead. I keep an online journal now.

Last summer I wrote longhand in a notebook for a couple of months, morning pages, and one day when I was writing I was so inspired that I started this blog! I kept it up for a bit, but went back to penzu because it is completely private. Sometimes I will write in a notebook but it is rare.

Certainly I can imagine returning to a pre – keyboard era. I think it would be harder for younger people who can barely remember those days. It would be strange though, and probably seem very tedious.

I like typing on the computer. It is easier to edit, change, save, and I process just as easily both ways. I am very happy to have this technology, just wish I could navigate WordPress more easily!

My sister and I

Daily prompt – Agree to Disagree

Immediately I thought of my sister. Ellen is two years older than me, and we love each other dearly. We’ve had many parallelisms (is that a word?) in our lives, but in so many ways we are different, and so there are a few things that we just don’t talk about.

We both married at 19, the first time, and without expecting it, we both had more than the usual amount of children – she had 5, and I, 7.  They are all grown now, but we did have our differences in raising them. I homeschooled, hers were public schooled. I was pretty bossy back then, tried to convince her to do things my way quite often. Knowing what I know now, I wouldn’t have been so pushy. Each of our children have become awesome unique individuals, in spite of and because of their mothers.

We both divorced our children’s fathers after long marriages – mine 23 years, hers 29. We both married again, me within months, she took a little longer.  We both divorced after much drama, difficulty, and grief, around the same time. No arguments there.

She met Todd right after her divorce, and married him a year later,.  I dated a bit before I met Robert, my boyfriend, and there is no talk of marriage at this point. We are blissfully cohabitating, something that I never would have dreamed of doing in my younger days.

The biggest things we don’t talk about, just silently agree to disagree about, are religion and politics.  She goes to church every week, and is a conservative Republican. I quit going to church two years ago (although I have strong spiritual beliefs), and although I don’t affiliate with a political party, definitely have made a strong left shift in my voting.

She lives in Arkansas, I am in Texas. She has her own business, Ellen’s Airbrush. I work in a hospital and have only just begun to pursue artistic endeavors. My sister inspires me,  but I am glad we live 400 miles apart. We have lovely short visits, and know we are there for each other.

Sara and Ellen 2014