I have been writing in my Penzu journal quite a bit, and have let the blogging go. The last couple of evenings I wrote longhand, reflecting on my day and planning for the next. Usually the planning is way too much. I have so much I want to do. Blogging is one of those things, so here I am!
I am often struck by profound thoughts and I think, wow, I could write about that! Then something else demands my attention and that thought drifts away. So I decided, this beautiful Sunday morning, to sit here and write about whatever comes to mind.
January has flown. After all the traveling and days off in December, I put my nose back to the grindstone and haven’t taken any time off from my “day job”. I have had plenty of opportunities to show compassion, to listen, and at times even to empathize with the people at the hospital who are in crisis. I am grateful for those opportunities.
I made a decision to deepen my Ayurvedic studies by joining the live online class instead of the independent study. I love the topic and the coursework, and had come to a point where it was time to participate in the first Clinical Intensive. I realized that I felt too scattered, and fitting it in around my work schedule, social activities, and visiting with my granddaughter wasn’t the best plan for me. So I talked with my teacher/mentor, and am now dedicated to the weekly class, and will be traveling to Portland, Maine the first week in April. I am very excited!
Another thing that has affected me, this past week, is that my father is in the hospital. He is almost 88, and his health has been failing, so this isn’t surprising. He’s in the hospital I work at, so the blessing is that I got to go see him. I haven’t seen him in over a year, due to the deep rift that his wife of five years has caused, keeping my siblings and I from being involved in his life. I wrote a long letter to him last year, and if you want to know the details it is published in two parts, here and here.
My next to youngest child turned 22 a couple of days ago. He lives in Massachussetts, is happy in his life with his partner and his cats, living out in the country. My hope as a parent is that all my children find love and happiness, as well as independence. Better that than wealth with loneliness and sorrow.
I like to think that I have some control over my perception of time, like not getting in a hurry and that sort of thing. But when I look back at my life, and raising my children, all grown now, much of it is like a vapor. Thinking about three years ago, just finally having freed myself from a very difficult marriage, and all that has happened since then, I am amazed. Looking back 20 years, to the birth of my youngest child and what has happened in her relatively short life – it is hard to believe.
Speaking of amazing — I’m going to be a grandmother, again! My second oldest son and his wife announced this month that they are going to be parents – of TWINS! Talk about uncertainty there! Embrace the unexpected, right? They will be wonderful parents.
Do you set intentions? I do all the time!
Today, I have the intentions of finishing and publishing this post, walking outside in the sunshine, cooking a nutritious lunch, putting paint on a canvas, and spending the evening with some friends celebrating a birthday.
This week, I intend to show compassion to everyone I meet, do some yoga at least 3 times, take a couple of long walks, study and practice ayurveda, spend time with people I love either on the phone or in person, and eat fresh nutritious food. I intend to write and paint, too!
What are your intentions? What are you grateful for?