Tag: authenticity

Expansion of Happiness

Sara MoserLeave a comment

I am finding, as I embrace uncertainty, that I am happier. Certainly there will be difficulties and sorrows in life, but there are ways of living that not only increase happiness when the sun is shining, but that will also keep the storms of life from tearing up my (or your) soul.

Here are some ways of being that I have found that ultimately lighten my burden and increase my happiness:

  • I don’t feel a need to please everyone.
  • I don’t feel a compulsion to explain myself anymore (most of the time!).
  • It’s ok if some people don’t “get” me. The ones who count, do.
  • I can be unavailable sometimes. I don’t have to answer your question immediately.
  • Conversely, I don’t have to ask so many questions, or know all the answers.
  • I don’t have to be anyone else’s idea of perfect. I am the only one I have to please – and it is ok if I’m a little bit (or a lot!) crazy.

I am realizing every day that there is no limit to my capacity to experience happiness. I’ve been going through a lot of transition the last couple of years — I divorced and moved from a house to an apartment, my two youngest children left home within 14 months of each other, I have a new wonderful love relationship,, my elderly father is becoming more dependent and childlike as his once brilliant mind fades — just to mention a few real life situations. But as I let life unfold, and take care of me first, which is what the list above is really about, I find that I have joy even when the road is bumpy, and a greater capacity for extending love and compassion to others.

“Although relatively few of us were told during our upbringing that the expansion of happiness is the purpose of life, most people sense somewhere in their soul that more joy ought to be part of the equation. How, then, do we move from a state of constriction to a state of ever greater freedom and happiness? the first step towards genuine awakening is setting the intention..deciding to live a life that reflects our right to happiness. This requires the recognition that we have the capacity to change the plotline of our life, even if we’ve been acting from the same script since before we can remember. It requires the recognition that we are the only one who cares enough about our happiness to make it a driving force. It requires believing at the deepest level of our being that we are capable and deserving of love.” – David Simon

What do you do for yourself, to increase your happiness?

Facing fear

Sara Moser6 Comments

I chose “embracing uncertainty” as the name of my blog because this has been my life, although until recently, I couldn’t see that. I always liked the illusion of being in control, of making things happen.

Learning the seven spiritual laws has really changed the way I look at life. Detachment simply means not being attached to a particular outcome, or point of view. I get up in the morning and have no idea what the day will bring. I meet someone or have a conversation, and let life flow, as opposed to imposing my views or desires on others, or even GOD.

For three months, since I started meditating regularly, I have asked myself the soul question: Who am I? The idea is to just ask,  then meditate, with no expectations of anything. This is really an effort for me , as I like immediate answers. I recently opened a book, The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron, subtitled A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity. The author suggests writing morning pages, three longhand pages of whatever comes to mind. The hope is that whatever is blocked will be released. So I have been doing this for a couple of weeks, and it has basically become a journaling. Yesterday I came across an author who mentors – http://www.joannefedler.com and got  her 21 spoonfed writing tips for finding your writing voice. The first tip is to “spend some time writing about what makes you who you are, what moments in your life have shaped you.” Wow. Same as the soul question.

So I sat to write. And admitted on paper that I resist this exploration. And started writing, not expecting much. But as I wrote, I was able to see that I am a passionate, loving woman, and I give myself wholly to those I choose to love. As I continued to explore events and people who have shaped me and my life, I had what to me was an amazing aha revelation – the facing of fear has shaped me in a major way. And this:

Facing fear is like walking blindfolded through a wall of flame, not knowing how badly I might be burned, or if I will survive the heat, and if I do survive, not knowing what I will find on the other side or if I will be able to handle it.

Accepting the inevitability of change doesn’t mean giving up what I want. I just recognize that I control my choices, but have no idea what the consequences will be. Watching life unfold becomes wonderful instead of fearful.