Golden Rule

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

This “rule”, known as the Golden Rule, comes from Matthew 7:12 in the Bible and is taught in some form or another to most small children in America, no matter the parents religious belief. Seems simple enough, but it certainly isn’t easy. If someone has harmed me, or cheated me, this little sentence becomes pretty radical.

I am reading a book called The Third Jesus by Deepak Chopra. As a person who lived and breathed fundamentalist Christianity for 25+ years, this book is a breath of fresh air. I have been questioning my beliefs for about 5 years now, not a churchgoer anymore, but always a lover of Jesus. I am finding answers to some of my deepest questions, bringing new clarity to the question, “What would Jesus do?” The simple answer, after reading about 50 pages, is love. Not just those who agree with him, or those who are kind to him, but everyone.

In Matthew 5:44-45 Jesus says to love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you…..God makes the sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the the righteous and the unrighteous.  Whoa. Can I really do that? And that seems pretty unfair!  This passage is speaking of divine love, the kind of love that is so beautiful yet so hard to live by. The images here are sun and rain – the basis of life, the source of nourishment. Inside each of us is a level of awareness that is as steady as the sun and as life-giving as rain. According to Dr. Chopra, this is pure Being, and without a connection to it, loving your enemy is impossible. This is a clear dividing line between everyday mortal consciousness and the higher state of consciousness Jesus was teaching about.

How do I apply these lofty ideas to my day to day life? That is the basic question for me. In general, I’m not persecuted. My workaday world is one in which I find myself having opportunity to help and serve people who are in distressing situations. My boss is pretty great most of the time. I have no coworker issues.  But I have plenty of judgmental thoughts, or I disagree with someone else’s actions or stated beliefs, or I see political posts on Facebook that make my blood boil.  What do I do?

On a daily basis, I meditate. I used to try to “pray”, as prescribed by the Church, but my soul never seemed to really connect with who I perceived God to be. Meditation has brought calmness to my soul, and a sense of connection to the greater universe, what some might call cosmic consciousness. As situations arise and negative ideas or thoughts permeate my brain, I try to pause and think about it. There are times that the right response is righteous anger, as when someone innocent is being harmed, but most of the time, the best action is to let the thoughts either settle or drift away, and  look for the loving response.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind….and love your neighbor as yourself.

These words from Matthew 22 are the basis of the God kind of love, whatever your personal beliefs are. This isn’t about being a monk, or a nun, or about going to church on Sunday, or being a follower of Jesus, or of Mohammed, or Buddha, or anyone else. This is really talking about a change of mind and heart, and it is not a struggle to simply love when the mind has found its god-source. It isn’t a struggle anymore. Just as a mother doesn’t have to think of loving her baby, loving the god-force by loving others comes as naturally as breathing.

The Hope of Loving
 
What keeps us alive, what allows us to endure?
I think it is the hope of loving, or being loved.
I heard a fable once about the sun going on a journey
to find its source, and how the moon wept
without her lover’s warm gaze.
We weep when light does not reach our hearts.
We wither like fields if someone close does 
not rain their kindness upon us.
 
  – Meister Eckhart

 

 

Expansion of Happiness

I am finding, as I embrace uncertainty, that I am happier. Certainly there will be difficulties and sorrows in life, but there are ways of living that not only increase happiness when the sun is shining, but that will also keep the storms of life from tearing up my (or your) soul.

Here are some ways of being that I have found that ultimately lighten my burden and increase my happiness:

  • I don’t feel a need to please everyone.
  • I don’t feel a compulsion to explain myself anymore (most of the time!).
  • It’s ok if some people don’t “get” me. The ones who count, do.
  • I can be unavailable sometimes. I don’t have to answer your question immediately.
  • Conversely, I don’t have to ask so many questions, or know all the answers.
  • I don’t have to be anyone else’s idea of perfect. I am the only one I have to please – and it is ok if I’m a little bit (or a lot!) crazy.

I am realizing every day that there is no limit to my capacity to experience happiness. I’ve been going through a lot of transition the last couple of years — I divorced and moved from a house to an apartment, my two youngest children left home within 14 months of each other, I have a new wonderful love relationship,, my elderly father is becoming more dependent and childlike as his once brilliant mind fades — just to mention a few real life situations. But as I let life unfold, and take care of me first, which is what the list above is really about, I find that I have joy even when the road is bumpy, and a greater capacity for extending love and compassion to others.

“Although relatively few of us were told during our upbringing that the expansion of happiness is the purpose of life, most people sense somewhere in their soul that more joy ought to be part of the equation. How, then, do we move from a state of constriction to a state of ever greater freedom and happiness? the first step towards genuine awakening is setting the intention..deciding to live a life that reflects our right to happiness. This requires the recognition that we have the capacity to change the plotline of our life, even if we’ve been acting from the same script since before we can remember. It requires the recognition that we are the only one who cares enough about our happiness to make it a driving force. It requires believing at the deepest level of our being that we are capable and deserving of love.” – David Simon

What do you do for yourself, to increase your happiness?