Tag: writing

June Jots

Sara MoserLeave a comment

June bug holdin on-1If April showers bring May flowers, what does June bring? JUNE BUGS! I haven’t seen any yet, but I know they are coming.

We’ve had an incredible amount of rain here this last month. If you saw on the news that there is record-breaking flooding in Houston, that is right down the street from me. I have not been personally affected. The worst day I just had to make a couple of detours to get to work. Very near me, however, there was water up to the roofs of the cars. Most people only suffered the loss of their car or damage to their home, but sadly there were a few who lost their lives. I have lived in this area all my life, and can’t recall flooding this bad outside of a hurricane or tropical storm.  In the aftermath of the rain, the mosquitos are plentiful! And June 1 marks the beginning of hurricane season. Aw, summer!

Starry night
Starry night

I finished this painting early this month:

Otherwise, it wasn’t a month for a lot of inspiration for me as far as writing or creativity.  I do think it was a turning point for me as far as this blog goes, as I wrote in Uninspired. I started this blog last year feeling very inspired, thinking that amazing wisdom would just roll out of me all the time. All you writers, stop laughing! On top of that, I was reading a lot about blogging, about how I should have a platform, or a focus, or… something besides random thoughts, anyway. The best thing I did was write about it, then not write, then write just for me, not for anyone else. And if sometimes I’m inspired about a topic, and other times I write about my travels or my daily life, I’m ok with that, and that is my platform, anyway after all – embracing uncertainty. If you enjoy reading about my life and what is in my head, that is icing on the cake.

I am continuing my Ayurvedic studies and yoga classes, and had some wonderful times with family and friends. Early in the month my son from Austin and my baby girl away at college drove in for the weekend and we had a wonderful family reunion. My oldest son is moving up near Dallas this month to be with his girl (wedding plans for August!) so that will leave only two of my kids left in the Houston area.

Then, as you faithful readers know, I took at trip to Iowa to visit my oldest daughter. I enjoyed writing about each day starting here, and if you enjoyed my ramblings you can look forward to more of that when I travel to Montana to visit my cousin in a few days.

Hope you have some fun plans for the summer!

 

Iowa day 4 – going home, musings, and a little history

Sara Moser2 Comments

Today I head home. Rachel and Geoff left for church around 9:30, and I departed shortly afterward. The train that was passing when I left was a double decker, which stopped for a few minutes, then started backwards. I wonder what that was all about.

I decided that I couldn’t leave town without visiting Cafe Diem one more time. Their coffee is really good, and I wanted another waffle. It is a good place to hang out and write. I had originally thought to drive into Des Moines and find a coffee shop there, but the warm and friendly atmosphere here beckoned me to come inside.

After I ate my delicious waffle, I spent a little time browsing around looking at travel blogs, and all the ones I found are to exotic faraway places. My little trip to Ames pales in comparison in some respects, but I am of the opinion that everywhere is interesting. Here’s a little information about this quaint midwest city, from Wikipedia:

The city was founded in 1864 as a station stop on the Cedar Rapids and Missouri Railroad and was named after 19th century U.S. Congressman Oakes Ames of Massachusetts, who was influential in the building of the transcontinental railroad. Ames was founded by local resident Cynthia Olive Duff  and railroad magnate John Insley Blair,near a location that was deemed favorable for a railroad crossing of the Skunk River.

Ames is also the home of Iowa State University, whose campus takes up a major part of the city proper, and whose mascot can be found around town in various attire. This mirror mosaic version on Main Street is my favorite!

 

Writing while I wait in the Des Moines airport…

 I love to take back roads, when I have time, so I took the opportunity. Miles and miles and miles of newly planted cornfields flew past me. I marveled at the wide open spaces, and the big sky. Very mind clearing and heart opening. Along the way, I got a phone call that my flight was delayed 45 min. So I got here with time to spare, still feeling pretty relaxed.
Announcement overhead: They need 12 volunteers to check their carry on bags or they will check boarding group 4’s bags. I’m in boarding group 4, and I want to hang on to my bag! If I didn’t have a connection I’d check it, but I don’t trust the airline to care about my stuff and get it moved to the right plane.
Another announcement: The flight is overbooked and they need 6 volunteers to take a later flight. Are you kidding me? Does this happen all the time? Seems crazy to me. What do they do if no one volunteers? Draw straws?
Now at Dallas Fort Worth Airport….
No rushing this time. Google just notified me that my connecting flight is delayed 2 hours!!

Obviously, I made it onto the plane and they didn’t confiscate my bag. I was imagining myself wrestling someone over it, and am very glad that fantasy didn’t come to pass! I had a window seat this time, so I got to see the farmland from the air, and later the beautiful changing clouds as we flew above them. I was very hungry when I got here, glad for some time to rest and recoup. I got a veggie burger at a place called UFood Grill. It had to be the worst veggie burger ever. I only ate a few bites, but the baked potato fries were a little better, so I ate enough of them to ease my hunger pangs. Airport food, yuk. By this time I was feeling very imbalanced, shaky, and tired.

So I decided to sit right there in the middle of the busy airport and meditate. I wrapped my silk shawl around me (I had read that silk can keep negative energy away), put one hand on my suitcase, closed my eyes, and went inward. It was an interesting endeavor, and 20 minutes later I opened my eyes feeling more grounded and alert.
Checking google on my phone, I found that my flight is delayed even more, not leaving here until 10:12 pm, arriving in Houston at 11:30. Then I have to get my car, and drive the 30 min home.
I again observe the people around me. Young, old, all shapes and sizes, some rushing frantically to catch their next flight, others taking their time, or just sitting. People on their phones. I wonder about their stories. I see a team of adolescent girls all dressed alike, most likely returning home from a tournament . There are couples, friends, family groups, lone travelers like me. Some are traveling for a happy visit, or a wedding, some for a funeral. This is an international airport, so I see a diverse crowd and hear snatches of different languages.

The masses of humanity are everywhere. Tomorrow I return to work, to the patients and coworkers who are a part of it all too. Everywhere there is life, hope, and heartbreak. I am glad to be on this journey, one soul touching other souls.

Epilogue:
The plane didn’t take off from Dallas until midnight. Delay after delay until I was too tired to care, or write, or even sleep. I finally got home to my sweetie at 2 am! I am very glad I made this trip, and reconnected with my daughter. It’s been a long time since we had one on one time.

Uninspired

Sara Moser7 Comments

I’ve felt uninspired lately.

I haven’t even been journaling as much. I sit to write and it sounds like the same stuff over and over. Additionally, I haven’t been making much time to read other blogs, even though there are several writers I really enjoy. On top of that, I haven’t painted or taken many pictures lately. Everything just seems sorta blah.

Every so often I’ll get on wordpress, read a few posts, and wonder how people write so much, some every day. I periodically wonder why I started a blog in the first place. Oh yeah! I thought I had something to say that was inspiring. Then I got all into Blogging 101 and Photography 101 and following other blogs and hoping people would follow mine. Now I look at the list of blogs I follow and I don’t have time to read all that.  I’m not getting new followers lately — but hey! I haven’t been writing much. Would just like the stats to say woohoo! you’ve reached xxxx followers.

Sigh. That’s bullshit. That’s no reason to write, or paint, or any other pursuit.  If, in the course of writing, I put something out there and someone truly finds inspiration, great. If not, I’ve expressed myself. This is what all the great writers and painters say- do it for yourself first. So if I don’t have anything for awhile, that’s ok. I’ll read and study and travel, and be curious about everything.

So. New resolution. Stop being so concerned about putting up a blog post for the sake of putting up a blog post.  And when in the course of  the journey of life inspiration comes, go for it, in whatever form it takes.

Still facing fear

Sara MoserLeave a comment

I am reblogging my first post. I “met” another blogger who had just started Morning pages, so went back to read this. Indeed there is something magical about writing 3 pages longhand about whatever is in your head first thing in the morning. So much has opened up for me in this last year, and there is so much opening up ahead.

Facing Fear (written and posted June 20, 2014)

I chose “embracing uncertainty” as the name of my blog because this has been my life, although until recently, I couldn’t see that. I always liked the illusion of being in control, of making things happen.

Learning the seven spiritual laws has really changed the way I look at life. Detachment simply means not being attached to a particular outcome, or point of view. I get up in the morning and have no idea what the day will bring. I meet someone or have a conversation, and let life flow, as opposed to imposing my views or desires on others, or even GOD.

For three months, since I started meditating regularly, I have asked myself the soul question: Who am I? The idea is to just ask,  then meditate, with no expectations of anything. This is really an effort for me , as I like immediate answers. I recently opened a book, The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron, subtitled A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity. The author suggests writing morning pages, three longhand pages of whatever comes to mind. The hope is that whatever is blocked will be released. So I have been doing this for a couple of weeks, and it has basically become a journaling. Yesterday I came across an author who mentors and got  her 21 spoonfed writing tips for finding your writing voice. The first tip is to “spend some time writing about what makes you who you are, what moments in your life have shaped you.” Wow. Same as the soul question.

So I sat to write. And admitted on paper that I resist this exploration. And started writing, not expecting much. But as I wrote, I was able to see that I am a passionate, loving woman, and I give myself wholly to those I choose to love. As I continued to explore events and people who have shaped me and my life, I had what to me was an amazing aha revelation – the facing of fear has shaped me in a major way. And this:

Facing fear is like walking blindfolded through a wall of flame, not knowing how badly I might be burned, or if I will survive the heat, and if I do survive, not knowing what I will find on the other side or if I will be able to handle it.

Accepting the inevitability of change doesn’t mean giving up what I want. I just recognize that I control my choices, but have no idea what the consequences will be. Watching life unfold becomes wonderful instead of fearful.

It’s February!

Sara Moser8 Comments

Here in southeast Texas it is 60 degrees. The temp is expected to climb into the 70’s this afternoon, then rain and a cold front, down in the 40’s tonight. This is my early morning lake view – if you look closely you can see the little coots.

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Looking back at the first month of the year objectively (if that is possible!) I am pleased with myself. I set some reading goals for myself  and finished the first book in about 3 weeks. Additionally, I finished Having our Say and returned it to the wine bar down the street. Setting a goal of only five books in a year may not seem like much, but I had gotten so out of the habit of reading that I  wanted to be realistic.  Now that I finished not one, but two books in under a month, I will likely add a few more to my list.

I posted here 13 times. I’ve thought about trying to write here every day and decided against it. I wrote a cathartic letter to my father, wrote from prompts a few times, and put up a couple of pictures I particularly liked. I have added several blogs to those I follow, and am enjoying interaction with some of you who follow me. (And I thank you for reading!) During November when I was partaking in Blogging 101 and Photography 101 it was exciting to see the numbers going up on my stats page. This past month I decided to pay less attention to that and continue my original purpose, which was and is to push past the fear of uncertainty and explore my voice and inner creativity.

I painted this picture:

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Although not entirely original, because I followed instructions from a book on acrylic painting, it is my own result, I learned some new techniques, and am very proud of it.

Other things I have done this month: Continued meditation, twice daily. Improved my eating habits. Committed to yoga class twice a week, for at least 3 months. Started walking outside more, as weather permits. Got Reiki 1 certification.

Goals for February: Keep showing up! Read, write, paint, draw. Practice kindness.

JUST FOR TODAY (reiki principles)

I will let go of worry

I will let go of anger

I will do my work honestly

I will give thanks for my many blessings

I will be kind to every living thing

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